Monday, March 31st, 2008...3:35 pm - Catherine Gleeson
Microsoft patents O’s and 1’s!!!
In a stunning revelation today Bill Gates announced that Microsoft has won exclusive rights to the use of 0’s and 1’s in perpetuity. In a statement released earlier today Gates was quoted as saying: “Yeah… all that Anti-Trust hoo-hah was just a furphy while we were sneaking this one under the radar…” Not content with owning virtually everything in the known world, Microsoft has now, effectively bought up the rights to all software, hardware “wetware” and in fact, the entire universe including black holes and stars. “I really felt like I couldn’t shuffle off this mortal coil without doing something good for humanity…” Bill Gates is reported as saying.
Human rights groups are outraged as they believe that Microsoft’s trump poses serious problems for civil liberty. “Now Microsoft even owns our DNA!”, asserted an unnamed spokeswoman for a prominent Human Rights organisation.
A spokesperson for O’Reilly said the network was “disappointed” as they have patents pending on 2’s and 3’s.” Apparently no-one had informed the network that 2’s and 3’s are not as valuable in binary code as 0’s and 1’s.
2 Comments
April 1st, 2008 at 2:00 am
Cool… Methinks I might patent 4,5,6,7,8,9 … then every time anyone mentions them they will have to pay me a license fee… cool… even writing the cheque for the license fee would incur a license fee… WOW!!! perpetual money!!… ye ha!!
April 5th, 2008 at 10:49 pm
Could this be an April foolsday prank?
Leave a Reply